16 year old dating 14 year old, is it legal/wrong?

[Unregistered]

Hello, I'm 16 and my birthday is 03/09/94 and the girl is 23/9/96.
I've gotten in trouble by my parents multiple times because they don't want me going to jail and they don't approve of the relationship. I really love her or I wouldn't be going through all this trouble. What should I do? My parents said next time I talk to her I'm being sent to a military school.


I live in PA

[sunlover]

Re: 16 year old dating 14 year old, is it legal/wrong?

You listen to your parents

[Unregistered]

Re: 16 year old dating 14 year old, is it legal/wrong?

While I dislike responding to children on here, and wish this forum would filter who's an adult and who's not, you need to obey your parents. You may be growing up but you are not ready for a relationship. You are nowhere near old enough to even begin to know what a grown up relationship consists of.

If you wind up getting her pregnant, it will be one more teen produced, illegitimate child in the world who did not ask for such a stigma. It's not fair to the child.

She is entirely too young for dating or boyfriends. She is still a child in many ways. She's certainly too young for a sexual relationship, which you will (or may have already) pressure her into. If you want a girlfriend and you believe you're ready, date a girl your own age.

Your parents know what's best. Obey them or face military school. You won't be dating anyone there.

[Unregistered]

While I dislike responding to children on here, and wish this forum would filter who's an adult and who's not, you need to obey your parents. You may be growing up but you are not ready for a relationship. You are nowhere near old enough to even begin to know what a grown up relationship consists of.

If you wind up getting her pregnant, it will be one more teen produced, illegitimate child in the world who did not ask for such a stigma. It's not fair to the child.

She is entirely too young for dating or boyfriends. She is still a child in many ways. She's certainly too young for a sexual relationship, which you will (or may have already) pressure her into. If you want a girlfriend and you believe you're ready, date a girl your own age.

Your parents know what's best. Obey them or face military school. You won't be dating anyone there.

Nobody said anything about a sexual relationship. There's nothing wrong with a little 2 year age gap. If the relationship becomes sexual while the girl is 14, 15, or even 16 in some cases then yes I believe that part is wrong. However, when she is 16+ (though I discourage it) if she is ready then the relationship can move on to that stage.

I felt the need to reply because I felt this comment was unreasonable. If the relationship stays innocent, then there is nothing wrong with it at all.

[Unregistered]

Re: 16 year old dating 14 year old, is it legal/wrong?

Nobody said anything about a sexual relationship. There's nothing wrong with a little 2 year age gap. If the relationship becomes sexual while the girl is 14, 15, or even 16 in some cases then yes I believe that part is wrong. However, when she is 16+ (though I discourage it) if she is ready then the relationship can move on to that stage.

I felt the need to reply because I felt this comment was unreasonable. If the relationship stays innocent, then there is nothing wrong with it at all.

Have you failed to notice the pandemic of teenage parents? There is nothing "innocent" about a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship. Teenagers are young adults and as such, have sexual hormones and sexual urges.

The only "unreasonable" comment left on this thread is yours.

[Unregistered]

Have you failed to notice the pandemic of teenage parents? There is nothing "innocent" about a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship. Teenagers are young adults and as such, have sexual hormones and sexual urges.

The only "unreasonable" comment left on this thread is yours.

Well I disagree with you, I'm 16, and my girlfriend is 14, we've been dating a year and I haven't preasured her into sex, contrary to popular belief, sex isn't all that's on a decent guys mind. She's actually the one who wants sex, and I've told her to wait a little longer. And I have a son, so does that make my little boy a "stigma on society"? If so what should I do? Take him and treat him like a horse with a broken leg? It all depends on the person dude, you've really gotta think what you say through

[Unregistered]

Re: 16 year old dating 14 year old, is it legal/wrong?

Well I disagree with you, I'm 16, and my girlfriend is 14, we've been dating a year and I haven't preasured her into sex, contrary to popular belief, sex isn't all that's on a decent guys mind. She's actually the one who wants sex, and I've told her to wait a little longer. And I have a son, so does that make my little boy a "stigma on society"? If so what should I do? Take him and treat him like a horse with a broken leg? It all depends on the person dude, you've really gotta think what you say through

agreed so what if thers an age gap as long as it isnt to vast theres no problem going out with a younger girl there isnt any problem with it and no offence to you elders out there you down grade teenagers too much and yes im a teenager 16 as well my girlfreind turns 15 this year and i havent pressured her into sex either so maybe your biased thoughts and expressions should be kept too yourself alone if your in love go for it

[Unregistered]

Re: 16 year old dating 14 year old, is it legal/wrong?

Well I disagree with you, I'm 16, and my girlfriend is 14, we've been dating a year and I haven't preasured her into sex, contrary to popular belief, sex isn't all that's on a decent guys mind. She's actually the one who wants sex, and I've told her to wait a little longer. And I have a son, so does that make my little boy a "stigma on society"? If so what should I do? Take him and treat him like a horse with a broken leg? It all depends on the person dude, you've really gotta think what you say through

A 16 year old with a child already telling another person to "think what you say through" How comically ironic.

Yes. The little boy is indeed a "stigma on society" if he was born illegitimately. Nobody thinks of these children and how when they learn history (or even their own family ancestry) will feel outcast when they come to realize they're not legitimate. It is - in fact - a stigma.

The author quoted above claims he hasn't pressured his 14 year old girlfriend for sex, yet goes on to admit to already fathering a child at the tender age of 16. Interesting.

It simply does not matter whether she's being pressured or not. The law is what people are here seeking answers for. 14 year old's are not old enough to consent to sex. If 16 is the age of majority in the 16 year old father's state, he can be charged with statutory rape.

Ah teenagers. They know it all's of society who think the adults don't have a clue. You can bet on this: you will change your tune when you get some age and maturity on you. Guaranteed.

[Unregistered]

Re: 16 year old dating 14 year old, is it legal/wrong?

Well I disagree with you, I'm 16, and my girlfriend is 14, we've been dating a year and I haven't preasured her into sex, contrary to popular belief, sex isn't all that's on a decent guys mind. She's actually the one who wants sex, and I've told her to wait a little longer. And I have a son, so does that make my little boy a "stigma on society"? If so what should I do? Take him and treat him like a horse with a broken leg? It all depends on the person dude, you've really gotta think what you say through

What part do you disagree with? You already have proven that teenagers have raging hormones that are difficult to keep in check. Your admittance to having a child at the age of 16 proves that. Yet you "disagree'?

[Unregistered]

Re: 16 year old dating 14 year old, is it legal/wrong?

Nor is it wrong or illegal. To be honest, whoever posted that ridiculously selfish comment is the one who's in need of growing up. It angers me when someone is so forward with their opinion when they know little or nothing about the situation. He/she needs to consider and accept the fact that teenage sex does take place, and cautions are being taken by many of them. Saying that a baby made as a result of teenage sex is a "stigma upon society" is just completely wrong and disgusting. It is still a human being, that was made by 2 able-bodied people, regardless of their age.

I'm aware that every one has a right to their own opinion, but you are clearly so misinformed. You need to get over the fact that teenagers are young adults and have sexual hormones and a sexual urge. What i dont agree with is for example, a 30 year old dating a minor. When it is as little as a 2 year gap, it is perfectly acceptable. Schools enroll in teaching about contraception and various other things to prevent teenage pregnancy from taking place. Clinics offer contraception to teenage girls. Teenagers in general should NOT be stereotyped as "dumb, hormonal, sex searching animals" because a fair few of them do take precautions, and are responsible enough to deal with these "issues"
Good ****ing day.

[Unregistered]

Re: 16 year old dating 14 year old, is it legal/wrong?

Nor is it wrong or illegal. To be honest, whoever posted that ridiculously selfish comment is the one who's in need of growing up. It angers me when someone is so forward with their opinion when they know little or nothing about the situation. He/she needs to consider and accept the fact that teenage sex does take place, and cautions are being taken by many of them. Saying that a baby made as a result of teenage sex is a "stigma upon society" is just completely wrong and disgusting. It is still a human being, that was made by 2 able-bodied people, regardless of their age.

I'm aware that every one has a right to their own opinion, but you are clearly so misinformed. You need to get over the fact that teenagers are young adults and have sexual hormones and a sexual urge. What i dont agree with is for example, a 30 year old dating a minor. When it is as little as a 2 year gap, it is perfectly acceptable. Schools enroll in teaching about contraception and various other things to prevent teenage pregnancy from taking place. Clinics offer contraception to teenage girls. Teenagers in general should NOT be stereotyped as "dumb, hormonal, sex searching animals" because a fair few of them do take precautions, and are responsible enough to deal with these "issues"
Good ****ing day.

Clearly, you are either a teenager or a adult suffering from a serious case of arrested development.

It's also clear you were not born into a generation where it was taboo to be a child sitting in a classroom the product of unwed parents or the child of divorce.

Illegitimacy is - indeed - a stigma on how far we had come as a society and if you have any desire whatsoever for higher learning - to expand your thought process for just a tad - you might want to learn a little bit about history, human behavior, sociology.

Teenagers having babies is a financial drain on society as a whole. Once you get out into the real world and start paying taxes - and get educated on our tax & welfare systems, you'll be in a better position to spout your opinion.

My taxes help to pay for the support of "Nancy" down the street who deliberately has children by different men out of wedlock. My tax money goes toward supporting her 4 children who all have different fathers.

She's well aware that she's not made the choice to marry at least one of the fathers so that she does not need welfare, but she chooses to have children out of wedlock with men she has no intention of marrying because she's aware that the courts and the government support her financially for doing so.

Her first child was born when she was just 16 years old. At that time she was a legal minor herself - still a child herself - and now she's created more burden for her parents and society by having a child at such a young age. She had to drop out of school and once she recruited the help of her family (back in the day parents had to pay for babysitting but now teens have built-in free babysitters) she went back to school to get her G.E.D. Guess who paid for that? Taxpayers.

I could go on but am inclined to believe any evidence that doesn't support your incredibly naive, self serving opinion would be dismissed.

The only selfish, misinformed opinion I see is yours.

[Unregistered]

I'm 14 and I have a boyfriend who is sixteen. You may think I am just a child and pay no attention to what I say, but adults underestimate teenagers maturity. To start I wanted to say about you all saying a child born with teenage parents is a "stigma on society" my mum was fifteen when she became pregnant with me. I am fine? I do well in school, my mum and my dad are now married, and I have a younger brother, my mum has also fostered my aunty and my uncle and raised them as her own. She's raised them since she was ten years old. She was very mature for her age yet you say it's wrong for teenagers to date and be sexually active? If that's what everyone thought, I wouldn't even be here today. When I was 13 I went out with my boyfriend I'm with now. He was 15 at the time. I asked my parents for their permission to be with him and they said no. So I went behond there back, I was with him for a month before they found out, I was heartbroken and I would not take no for an answer. So my parents decided to meet him and let us be together. My boyfriend use to drink ALOT every weekend and that would cause me and him to argue. Wed argue alot and it was horrible. Our relationship ended very bad, but there was so many good times. We tried to get over eachother, I went out all the time and spoke to loads of boys trying to get my mind off him, and he drank ridiculous amounts of alcohol, we use to wind each other up and make eachother jelous. It wasn't good. But then sadly when I was 14 and he was 16 my uncle took his own life, and I decided to speak to him as I needed him and he was also friends with my uncle as my uncle was very young, he was my big brother we was very close, and my boyfriend was there for me no matter what, even thou we had been horrible to eachother for the past year, we fell out again after that, and he decided to try and make up with me. I wouldn't speak to him as I thought "I had learnt from my mistakes and he is one of them" I was scared of having my heart broken again. But i started speaking to him in the end as he promised he would never leave again. now I am 15 in a couple months and that same month hel turn 17, were together and I love him very much. He doesn't drink anymore. Only like once a month and depending who wants to go with him, if there are loads of girls I might get abit funny and he decides not to go, everything is amazing now, and we really want to tell my parents, but we can't yet. Were waiting till I'm 15 to tell them. My mum doesn't really care because it's my life and it's my choice but my dad wants me to have nothing to do with him, he hates him even though he met him once? My mum trusts me alot as when me and my boyfriend list our Virginitys to each other the first time we went out, I told my mum, and she was not angry and I weren't in trouble. Adults should bf that way coz then kids will tell you stuff. I don't care what my parents think. They can say no but we'd only wait longer. You adults shouldn't underestimate teenagers. We have real feelings too, were gonna argue too, and were gonna be having sex too. it's not fair, were not young enough to play with toys and do what children do but were not old enough to do what adults do? It's hard. Adults should learn to let go. It would make everything a whole lot easier. Btw I am living in England and I don't know what the exact law in America Is but I'm sure it's pretty much the same

[Unregistered]

Re: 16 year old dating 14 year old, is it legal/wrong?

A truly mature teenager would have the capacity to understand the legalities involved when speaking on this topic. That these teenagers cannot fathom that proves they are not as mature as they think they are.

Of course, once we're adults for any real length of time, we look back on our thoughts, points of views, opinions and feelings as teenager and realize how rigid and underdeveloped out emotions really are.

This topic has absolutely nothing to do with maturity. It has everything to do with legalities involved. Once the teenager is able to comprehend that very crucial detail, then they can wax mature about topics like this one.

Trust me, little girl. There are far more worrisome things to think about than the puppy love of a teenage mind. You have literally nothing else on your mind to worry about other than friends, grades and "love". You don't have the first clue what the real world is all about.

Mark my words, you'll look back on your teenage angst one day and feel silly for believing you were so "mature", when all you had on your mind was your hat.

[Unregistered]

I found that comment very immature for such a "mature" adult to write. Please don't act as If you know me. I have alot more to worry about than you think I do. Things that some adults would struggle with. I was just simply sharing my experience on this topic. I know it's more about the legal side of it, but come on he's not gonna get done unless someone grasses? And no one does that. The worst thing anyone could do when they know something is grass, because they will get so much stick for it. You say "love" as if I don't know what it is? My mum and my dad got together when my mum was fourteen, and there still together. Their married, two kids, nice house? If they didn't love eachother then that wouldn't have happened, there is not an age on emotion, it simply depends on the person, I think this person who posted his problem in the first place should pay no attention to anyone else and do what he feels is best.

[Unregistered]

While I dislike responding to children on here, and wish this forum would filter who's an adult and who's not, you need to obey your parents. You may be growing up but you are not ready for a relationship. You are nowhere near old enough to even begin to know what a grown up relationship consists of.

If you wind up getting her pregnant, it will be one more teen produced, illegitimate child in the world who did not ask for such a stigma. It's not fair to the child.

She is entirely too young for dating or boyfriends. She is still a child in many ways. She's certainly too young for a sexual relationship, which you will (or may have already) pressure her into. If you want a girlfriend and you believe you're ready, date a girl your own age.

Your parents know what's best. Obey them or face military school. You won't be dating anyone there.

You're dumb.