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How can I get my husband out of the house if he refuses to leave?

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  • #91
    Re: How can I get my husband out of the house if he refuses to leave?

    When you marry someone, the vows state for better or worse, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, for better or worse. If you did not plan on honoring those vows, you should not have married in the first place. If you are unhappy with who you "elected", you should have spent more time campaigning before the election. People find it is easier to have text and email relationships rather than working on their own. People have needs. If you really love your spouse, you will find a way to work in each others needs, no matter how strange they are. If you didn't see it coming, you married too fast. That is the part about loving and honoring even if the cherish part becomes difficult. The crap about I didn't realize he/she was like that is your own fault. It does not mean you should stay and be abused. It means you should put the biggest error where it belongs, on yourself. Those who repeat that are guilty of serial stupidity.
    Due to a recent promotion, I should now be referred to as Major Obvious.

    I would not be trying to provide information and knowledge if I did not sympathize.

    Some days it is just not worth chewing through the restraints to face life.

    Comment


    • #92
      Re: How can I get my husband out of the house if he refuses to leave?

      Originally posted by Disagreeable View Post
      When you marry someone, the vows state for better or worse, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, for better or worse. If you did not plan on honoring those vows, you should not have married in the first place. If you are unhappy with who you "elected", you should have spent more time campaigning before the election. People find it is easier to have text and email relationships rather than working on their own. People have needs. If you really love your spouse, you will find a way to work in each others needs, no matter how strange they are. If you didn't see it coming, you married too fast. That is the part about loving and honoring even if the cherish part becomes difficult. The crap about I didn't realize he/she was like that is your own fault. It does not mean you should stay and be abused. It means you should put the biggest error where it belongs, on yourself. Those who repeat that are guilty of serial stupidity.
      Pure B.S! No one needs to put up with abuse, either physical, mental or financial at the hands of someone who one time professed to love them.

      A lot of abusers dont' show their true colors until after marriage when they feel the person is committed and trapped in the relationship.

      Yeah, everyone has needs. An abuser for a victim. And those who blame the victim have no empathy or understanding of the syndrome. Excusing the perpetrator raises questions about one's own leanings and predilictions.

      Comment


      • #93
        Re: How can I get my husband out of the house if he refuses to leave?

        There you go, off on a bender again. I will politely refrain from making you look like more of a fool than you do to yourself, since I promised Forum Admin not to engage with you, when you go off your nut. I will simply repeat what I said and remark it appears you would never be able to have a successful relationship in your mental state. I said "It does not mean you should stay and be abused. It means you should put the biggest error where it belongs, on yourself." There is no such thing as "abusers don't show their true colors". What there is a are "stupid people who ignore what is there, see what they want to, don't take enough time to learn who they are marrying and believe they can change what is there".


        Originally posted by Friend In Court View Post
        Pure B.S! No one needs to put up with abuse, either physical, mental or financial at the hands of someone who one time professed to love them.

        A lot of abusers dont' show their true colors until after marriage when they feel the person is committed and trapped in the relationship.

        Yeah, everyone has needs. An abuser for a victim. And those who blame the victim have no empathy or understanding of the syndrome. Excusing the perpetrator raises questions about one's own leanings and predilictions.
        Due to a recent promotion, I should now be referred to as Major Obvious.

        I would not be trying to provide information and knowledge if I did not sympathize.

        Some days it is just not worth chewing through the restraints to face life.

        Comment


        • #94
          It is obvious this jerk is a man, c'mon ladies we all see it




          =Unregistered;222564]Judging from the hostile vitriol of your response, you likely had him falsely arrested in order to get him out of the house.

          You begin your childish rant with typical name calling. My 10 year old niece is more adult than you.

          Your "broke" situation is nobody's fault but your own. Choosing to "believe his sorry a s s" was still a choice, wasn't it, tootsie roll? It's always someone else's fault isn't it? That makes it easier to not have to look in the mirror doesn't it? If you're honest with yourself, you'll admit that you're more mad at yourself for allowing yourself to be used and abused than you are angry at anyone. But somehow I doubt you have that much strength of character (if your post is any indication of your mentality).

          Further, nobody is forcing you to stay married to such an "abusing drunk" are they? Own up to your own culpability or is it simply more fun to sling mud?

          Get some anger management therapy. You clearly need it.[/QUOTE]

          Comment


          • #95
            s of miles away. I spent all the money on things to make my boyfriend happy and am broke now... both our names are ohave came and seen me covered in bruises they never arrest him. I have no family in this world. I was raised by my adoptive parents who are now deceased. I have no job just my brother and sisters income for their disabilities. I cant go anywhere even if I wanted to. My BF wont get the hell out of my home or my life. He dont pay anything, i have a reciept for everything i own.... tell me what someone in these situations are supposed to do. Its not that we choose to stay in them, or we wouldnt be on here asking for help and advice! as i write this my BF is drilling me about what im doing... I have to go between this and the walmart page saying im looking for curtains... someone who talks **** I wish some will help me I hate this I came Di this no more

            Comment


            • #96
              Originally posted by Friend In Court View Post
              Abusers side with other abusers, so one can ignore anonymous postings that call women names who have been battered and abused and side with the abuser. No wonder such posters prefer to remain anonymous. Lots of mysogenists out there.
              Just because you know a cliche doesn't mean you have to use...I feel sorry for anymore trapped anywhere but lets be "chronic illness" is a euphemism for"I never worked outside the home but don't really have a terminal or truly debilitating illness" and by calling someone a mysogenist your prolly a little off he doesnt hate all women im sure probably just has a strong distaste for someone who took vows and in the absence of anything truly dangerous(from what were told) or even any alleged infidelity even goes so far to call such a man the solebreadwinner???only from an objective point of view can it really be determined if your situation is unlivable, if thats not the truth(not saying it is or isnt either way)then what were seeing with this phenomenon of"divorce him and take everything he has"is state sanctioned grand theft through simply abandoning your marriage vows"God only knows but to demonize men who have been robbed of their families homes and savings without just cause is to betray your true nature.ive been around the whole battered women scene before and it is very cultish it has its own cliches support groups and pyscho babble thats designed to circumvent the established legal order of things.from what the OP said in the original post it doesnt seem like its a matter of danger but one of comfort and personal preferences...but just to show you im not a mysogenist you can get into a safe house without having been beaten recently if there is a real threat of anykind of violence against you and a case workers finds it credible and they tend to err on the side of caution...but dont start calling everyone who sees red flags in her statement a woman hater...the way the laws are written theycan be easily manipulated and abused inwhich case someone whos statement betrays a full share of fault for throwing a marriage away then that is not a helpless person when someone has trouble making a marriage work and are stripped of their lives in total and the laws are skewed in such a way as to side with the accuser without a true burden of proof(let it all be established on the testimonyof two or more witnesses)THAT is the truly disenfranchised person who needs protection thats the underdog(try being a guy in divorce court lol oh the justice of it all )not the person youve been conditioned sympathize with ...learn to think for yourself not every woman who cries foul really got a raw deal hell my own aunt was a professional divorcee' and there is a whole class of women like this who along with their vindictive gender-biased supporters are rotting our country from within( never mind losing a parent whats really traumatic is changing schools..see your statement kind of gives you away but have nofear even if your acting unjustly the law will side with you so why not drop the pretensions you know) ill say this though women sure know how keep a good thing going when they want to if it were guys who had the laws skewed intheir favor wed have messed it up a long ti.e ago ...

              Comment


              • #97
                Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                The other unregistered user who says this woman is lying sounds like an abuser themselves - or an abusers mother who sees nothing wrong in her sons lies. I have had this situation,My husband is a control freak behind closed doors he is SCARY but to the police and courts and outside world he lies he's way out of things and charms the birds out of the trees.These men wont leave because they love the power and control and they love the thrill of being able to fool the outside world -some are real smart and even plan murder etc.Noone has the right to treat other beings badly and what sort of person are you to condone someone in a very sad situation you are obviously not a nice person yourself.I am alone in another country so i know how difficult it is to gain help -these men always isolate their partners so they can do these things in secret-if i was back in the UK i could easily leave but I also have nowhere to go but am planning to leave.It is just the threats that one dark night he will come and kill you that has kept me with him so long. To the lady in question -if you get a restraining order he will have to go but you will have to fight your case in court -emotional abuse is just the same as physical so list everything and you should win ,be brave and stand up to him and buy a big nasty dog
                good luck.
                Hows does one control you without violence?financially?get a job?emotionally? Not even gonna get in to

                Comment


                • #98
                  Re: How can I get my husband out of the house if he refuses to leave?

                  It is unfortunate that all you can do is criticize the person seeking help. You sound like an abuser yourself and you don't need to be on this forum at all. Find some other way to relieve your stress. I suggest therapy and counseling. Does it really make your day that you hurl insults and Oh and btw, don't worry about responding back to me because I wont entertain this thread by viewing an abusers response. Good riddance.

                  Comment


                  • #99
                    Hello, I Just want to thank Dr Sanjay for the great things he has been doing for people in our country and things he has done for me,After my huband of 6years of marriage left me for another woman all because i could not give him a child,i hated myself and almost committed suicide because i truly loved my husband with all my heart. Due to this i even lost my job,Because i was always drinking and crying because i truly loved my husband with all my heart,So then i was listening to radio one faithful day and i heard someone talking about Dr Sanjay on radio, How generous and trustworthy the man is, How Dr Sanjay helped her in bringing back her ex within 24hours,i was like i need to get in touch with this man,i got a pen and wrote Dr Sanjay's number and email,So I decided to give him a call and told him how people talk about him online, I believed this man was real due to the way he spoke to me on the phone. Then he told me not to worry and he said he knows i have lost my job i was shocked and i told him yes,He said everything would be sorted out within 48hours,So i was very happy when i had that good news,Truly within 48hours i got a call from my husband saying he is very sorry for what he has done to me, he came to me in tears to forgive him which i did,As i was giving my husband a sweet cuddle i got a call from the company i worked telling me to resume work by monday,i was so happy please friend Dr Sanjay his truly a trusted man that cast real spell and a man to believe in. Dr Sanjay has made a good name here in our country. Please contact him on his private mail [email protected] . com

                    Comment


                    • Re: How can I get my husband out of the house if he refuses to leave?

                      Hello, I Just want to thank Dr Sanjay for the great things he has been doing for people in our country and things he has done for me,After my huband of 6years of marriage left me for another woman all because i could not give him a child,i hated myself and almost committed suicide because i truly loved my husband with all my heart. Due to this i even lost my job,Because i was always drinking and crying because i truly loved my husband with all my heart,So then i was listening to radio one faithful day and i heard someone talking about Dr Sanjay on radio, How generous and trustworthy the man is, How Dr Sanjay helped her in bringing back her ex within 24hours,i was like i need to get in touch with this man,i got a pen and wrote Dr Sanjay's number and email,So I decided to give him a call and told him how people talk about him online, I believed this man was real due to the way he spoke to me on the phone. Then he told me not to worry and he said he knows i have lost my job i was shocked and i told him yes,He said everything would be sorted out within 48hours,So i was very happy when i had that good news,Truly within 48hours i got a call from my husband saying he is very sorry for what he has done to me, he came to me in tears to forgive him which i did,As i was giving my husband a sweet cuddle i got a call from the company i worked telling me to resume work by monday,i was so happy please friend Dr Sanjay his truly a trusted man that cast real spell and a man to believe in. Dr Sanjay has made a good name here in our country. Please contact him on his private mail [email protected] . com

                      Comment


                      • Re: How can I get my husband out of the house if he refuses to leave?

                        Chloe, I am so glad things have worked so well for you. I'm glad you want to share your good fortune. Please send me a money order for $500 every month to John Smith PO BOX 123 Houston TX 55512.


                        Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                        My name is Chloe Elliott, I am from Chicago, I am here to testify to the good work of Dr. Igbudu. 2 years ago, my husband left home, he never returned, no phone calls, no letters, no emails, no sign of him anywhere. My daughter got sick with multiple sclerosis, things were so tough for me. I had lost hope, 2 years ago, I met a psychic, he said he would help me, I paid over $6800 and still nothing happened, I lost hope completely, my daughter's situation got worse each day. Last month, I saw a posting concerning the good works of the whole professionals, I gave them a try... I paid about $2000, for all three spells (Bring Lover back, Healing spell and Career spells). In a matter of weeks, my husband called me and told me he was sorry and that he wants to come back to me and that he would explain everything when he comes back, three days later, i got a new job with an Oil company, right now, my daughter's condition is getting better each day and i trust she would be well in a matter of days. I want to thank IGBUDU SPELL CASTER you can contact them via email (email address removed by admin)
                        Due to a recent promotion, I should now be referred to as Major Obvious.

                        I would not be trying to provide information and knowledge if I did not sympathize.

                        Some days it is just not worth chewing through the restraints to face life.

                        Comment


                        • Omg! You people have no empathy. Im sorry what you are going through. There is not much you can do from what i found out for my situation. I have an jobless alcoholic verbaly abusive that I've been married too for 25 yrs. I left 4 years ago we lost our home and he was homeless I offered my couch for a few months, he's now been here a year and i cant do anything about it beside a divorce, which still takes a year or so before he would have to leave. I have no idea what to do!. Anyhow my suggestion would be to get a wireless camera that would show the abuse. Good Luck!

                          Comment


                          • Re: How can I get my husband out of the house if he refuses to leave?

                            What you do is begin the process of divorcing the lazy drunk. And perhaps consider some counseling to help steel yourself to his manipulative ways (which WILL happen) when he realizes his lazy, abusive butt is going to be tossed out.

                            And you do realize the May 22, 2014 posting regarding the stupid SPELL CASTER was a scam, correct?

                            Gail

                            Comment


                            • Obviously, misguided and lacking any kind of compassion, would be my best guess. If you want out of such a monstrous relationship, but don't have the support or financial means to do so....try recording his outburst on your phone, tablet, or any other device you may have(even if you don't have the picture the audio will be enough to suffice for proof to get him out). Make sure you have done your research, and get a good attorney. You will need to come up with the initial 5-7k. You can do this by buying things that you can sell or pond or slowly put money aside in a safe place depending on how financial controlling your spouse is. If you have a good attorney, they will be able to get the money reimbursed to you, and have your husband pay future attorney bills.
                              Also note, going to a shelter can be a very traumatic experience for you and you children. That being said, if lucky and the facilities aren't over capacity, which they probably are, you and how many ever children you have could get one small room for yourselves and your things. Just think this through, come up with a plan, and take action. Good luck!

                              Comment


                              • Re: How can I get my husband out of the house if he refuses to leave?

                                IDK what his income level is but often when people are like him they hang around because you cook? Stop bringing home food. Remove all the reasons he is there including yourself if you can. Hang out at the library sleep around at friends houses if you can have the power turned off if you can. Do all you can to let him know that he is not wanted there and things are changing. Just the lack of services should get him to seek greener pastures.

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