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  • Mother ran with child without custody

    Hi,
    I live in Philadelphia, PA
    I have a situation where, as a father I thought I was doing everything possible to have my child in my life. I have my name on the paternity paperwork from the hospital as well as the my name on the birth cit. The mother and the child were both living with me and throughout our relationship I constantly found her cheating. Now while pregnant she stated in a arguement that I would only see know my chld through post cards. Thinking hormones I sat it aside. But throughtout December the mother made it difficult to stay together. I put up with her because of the fact I was not going to throw my son's mother in the street. But behind my back she made a deal with another person to take my son away from me. Upon learning this (not knowing anything about custody at the time) I filed for custody. About a week later she disappeared with my son and told me I would never be able to see him again. I filed for Emergency Relief, but the courts took their time and she left before service could have been issued. Now the Courts are telling me I can't do anything because I cannot serve her. I have learn that she is aware of avoiding service and someone in my own family asisted her. Now, she also severved all communications so that I cannot locate her for service.
    I have aquired a lawyer and also attainted an investagation with this matter, but money is scarce and I am out of options. I have not seen or heard anything about my son since the 16th of Dec. She disappeared on the 20th. I even attempted to contact the person she is staying with only to find out this was a plan for some time now.
    i fear for the well being of my son, who has missed his appointments with his doctor and with WIC. Sadly no one is willing to help without the custody paperwork in effect. Police and others.... And without service I cannot get that custody paperwork...

    Lost on what to do next, while attempting to follow these horrible guidelines of the commonwealth of Penn...

  • #2
    Re: Mother ran with child without custody

    I wish to inform you that you may contact a member of the Child Exploitation Task Force at your local FBI office. Further, under the provisions of the Unlawful Flight to Avoid Prosecution (UFAP)—Parental Kidnapping when criminal charges are filed by a state that requests FBI's help, a criminal arrest warrant can be issued for an abducting parent who flees across state lines.

    AFF

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by AFFA View Post
      I wish to inform you that you may contact a member of the Child Exploitation Task Force at your local FBI office. Further, under the provisions of the Unlawful Flight to Avoid Prosecution (UFAP)??"Parental Kidnapping when criminal charges are filed by a state that requests FBI's help, a criminal arrest warrant can be issued for an abducting parent who flees across state lines.

      AFF
      None of that is appropriate. As you weren't married mom has sole custody.

      Until you can get her served there is little else you can do.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Mother ran with child without custody

        In the case of an unwed couple, the mother of the child has presumed custody rights, while the father has to prove paternity before gaining those rights. When an unmarried couple has a child, custody is automatically given to the mother. If the father wants to assert his rights to the child, he must legally prove his paternity; otherwise, sole custody remains with the mother. If the mother is deemed a good parent, an unwed father will typically not win custody, but he can take legal action to ensure custody and/or visitation rights. So, speak with an expert family lawyer first.

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Mother ran with child without custody

          Thanks, for that information
          Like I stated before, because I do live in the commonwealth of Pa, I was informed that I do have rights as a father, and the rights are equal. Until, through court, cusody is established he is "property of the state. Now, paternity was astablished when he was born, I have a copy as well as birth certificate. And I was awarded an order for court proceducers but like I said now she is avoiding service. Mental Heath assessment is next, but without service, am I stuck?? And I havea laywer as well as an investagator and a case with the national center for missing and exploited children... We just can locate her.
          So without finding her do I have little chance of seeing my son like she threated?

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Mother ran with child without custody

            Also to add to my case, this woman whom lived with me, also quit work of three weeks, cancel his daycare of two weeks, and within a week and a half of learnin how I was not goin to be her boyfriend to let her sit around all day cheat on me, but still was going to take care of my son,, decided to disappear in another state, messing up his welfare and medical... I worry for my son with being around complete strangers whom she only met online.

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Mother ran with child without custody

              An unwed mother has sole legal and physical custody, regardless of whether dad is on the BC or not. Dad must petition the court to obtain visitation/custody, and until he gets an order he has no rights to the child.

              Some light reading: Price Of Shacking Up

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Mother ran with child without custody

                Originally posted by goddessoflubboc View Post
                An unwed mother has sole legal and physical custody, regardless of whether dad is on the BC or not. Dad must petition the court to obtain visitation/custody, and until he gets an order he has no rights to the child.

                Some light reading: Price Of Shacking Up
                Thanks again for the reply.
                This is not answer the question at that I have. The question is about service.
                Taking out the information about father's rights, if a mother is hiding from the court system to avoid service to show for court with the life of the child is at rist (this lifestyle in hiding also being deemed as child abuse according to attorneys.com info on "What Constitutes as Parental Kidnapping") what can be done on a legal stand point, about service. As far as the police and the courts are concerned, because of the stipulations of the Commonwealth I am within my rights to go get my son back because we have equal rights to the child, but we have no location.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Mother ran with child without custody

                  Thanks again for the reply.
                  This is not answer the question at that I have. The question is about service.
                  Taking out the information about father's rights, if a mother is hiding from the court system to avoid service to show for court with the life of the child is at rist (this lifestyle in hiding also being deemed as child abuse according to attorneys.com info on "What Constitutes as Parental Kidnapping") what can be done on a legal stand point, about service. As far as the police and the courts are concerned, because of the stipulations of the Commonwealth I am within my legal rights as a father to go get my son back because we have equal rights to the child, but we have no location.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Mother ran with child without custody

                    Originally posted by ShizArtist View Post
                    Thanks again for the reply.
                    This is not answer the question at that I have. The question is about service.
                    Taking out the information about father's rights, if a mother is hiding from the court system to avoid service to show for court with the life of the child is at rist (this lifestyle in hiding also being deemed as child abuse according to attorneys.com info on "What Constitutes as Parental Kidnapping") what can be done on a legal stand point, about service. As far as the police and the courts are concerned, because of the stipulations of the Commonwealth I am within my legal rights as a father to go get my son back because we have equal rights to the child, but we have no location.
                    There are several organizations that can help you locate her and your child. It will be up to you to do some aggressive self help now and get as many people involved as possible to find your child.

                    A few are; the FBI which assists in locating missing children, including parental abductions. On their website they also have a very helpful booklet on tips to locate a missing child.

                    Also, the Polly Klas Foundation assists in situations like yours; 800-587-4357 where you can talk with someone right away.

                    The International Center for Missing Children is another valuable resource, 1-800-The-Lost.

                    Gather up the best pictures you have of both the child and the mother and forward them to the agencies who offer to help.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Mother ran with child without custody

                      As with any court action, she must be served before it can commence.

                      Depending on local statutes and the particulars of your case, you MAY have alternatives to personal service.

                      Serving someone over the age of 18 at the address where she lives or is known to be;
                      Service by publication - essentially an ad in the general daily paper where she is last known to have lived.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Mother ran with child without custody

                        Originally posted by 130smartchick View Post
                        As with any court action, she must be served before it can commence.

                        Depending on local statutes and the particulars of your case, you MAY have alternatives to personal service.

                        Serving someone over the age of 18 at the address where she lives or is known to be;
                        Service by publication - essentially an ad in the general daily paper where she is last known to have lived.
                        He is not looking for court action -- but an absconded mother who kidnapped the child. This is a matter for police involvement.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Mother ran with child without custody

                          Thanks so much for that information. I have already contacted 1-800-The Lost and have an open case with them, luckily my investigator helped me with that after the first service. I will look into the other information ASAP.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Friend In Court View Post
                            He is not looking for court action -- but an absconded mother who kidnapped the child. This is a matter for police involvement.
                            This is an unmarried father filing his first petition to obtain the rights of access to his child.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: Mother ran with child without custody

                              Still looking around and contacting organizations. Being a civil court clerk that works for the city a lot of people are trying to help me, but we need help looking past what friends in Family court can do. Again service, service, service... I even have friends that are process servers that are waiting to get a location to hand deliver for me.
                              Agreed that I am a a father that was taking care of his son AND the mother to the point of biking to and from work, 6 miles a day to keep her phone on, just to have her turn and betray me like this.

                              I am in contact with the International Center. I made calls that they also suggest. But they still have to sit still while getting to the point of custody. Thanks for using the word absconded mother. That is a great term that describes her perfectly.

                              Does any one have any ideas of routes I can take to find history on her. I have reasons to believe that she has other children who we cannot find records of, would I need supeanas or can I go about it other ways without the extra cost?

                              Comment

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