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Im 15 and scared

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  • Im 15 and scared

    I'm from NY and i don't want to live with my dad anymore but don't know how to tell him? I'm scared i will tell him the wrong way or he will take my mom back to court and lie so i will live with him more. in the past i have met with a law guardian before a court session to explain how i feel so that the court can come up with the best living condition for me. this law guardian has not done me justice and has done the complete opposite of everything i want. my parents both agreed on one thing to get me another law guardian but the court will not allow it. i do not want to live with my dad anymore because he does not treat me like a child should be. my stepmother does not like me because i like my mom and she is jealous of that so she treats me less than an equal. my sister has chosen to live with my dad full time and my step-mom treats her like a best-friend. i am not allowed to eat or drink without asking, i am only allowed to do as im told.

  • #2
    Re: Im 15 and scared

    Many times at your age, you can feel no one in the home loves you or cares about you. The GAL is not supposed to make recommendations based on what you want. The GAL makes them based on what they feel is in your best interests. Why don't you take a few paragraphs and tell us about mom, about dad and about how your life living conditions are now.
    Due to a recent promotion, I should now be referred to as Major Obvious.

    I would not be trying to provide information and knowledge if I did not sympathize.

    Some days it is just not worth chewing through the restraints to face life.

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    • #3
      Re: Im 15 and scared

      Originally posted by laxplayer19 View Post
      I'm from NY and i don't want to live with my dad anymore but don't know how to tell him? I'm scared i will tell him the wrong way or he will take my mom back to court and lie so i will live with him more. in the past i have met with a law guardian before a court session to explain how i feel so that the court can come up with the best living condition for me. this law guardian has not done me justice and has done the complete opposite of everything i want. my parents both agreed on one thing to get me another law guardian but the court will not allow it. i do not want to live with my dad anymore because he does not treat me like a child should be. my stepmother does not like me because i like my mom and she is jealous of that so she treats me less than an equal. my sister has chosen to live with my dad full time and my step-mom treats her like a best-friend. i am not allowed to eat or drink without asking, i am only allowed to do as im told.
      What do you mean, your dad doesn't treat you like a child should be treated?

      Your stepmother isn't required to be nice or treat you as an equal - because you are NOT an equal. She is an adult, and you are not. She also sees herself as a rival to your mother since you like your mom more than you like her. That's to be expected in a step-family relationship such as yours.

      Perhaps you are just frustrated because you want things that your dad doesn't think are appropriate for you at your age.
      "If it ain't in writing, it never happened."
      "A lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part."
      "You can never make the same mistake twice, because the second time you make it, it's not a mistake, but a CHOICE."

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      • #4
        Re: Im 15 and scared

        depending on your age you legally can choose who you want to live with and no one can stop you I had go through the same thing except opposite i didn't want to live with my mother cause my step father here in wv once a child hits the age or 15 we are able to choose who went want to live with find out what age it is there as soon as you hit that age tell a judge who you want to live with or call your mother have her take him to court and tell them everything that goes on in your home and that you want live with your mother. i just left took my thing told my mother i was going to live with my father there was nothing she could do because i was old enough to choose on my own

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        • #5
          Re: Im 15 and scared

          Originally posted by crrimsonwolf View Post
          depending on your age you legally can choose who you want to live with and no one can stop you I had go through the same thing except opposite i didn't want to live with my mother cause my step father here in wv once a child hits the age or 15 we are able to choose who went want to live with find out what age it is there as soon as you hit that age tell a judge who you want to live with or call your mother have her take him to court and tell them everything that goes on in your home and that you want live with your mother. i just left took my thing told my mother i was going to live with my father there was nothing she could do because i was old enough to choose on my own
          WRONG - on so many levels. This person is 15. They do not legally have the right to choose where they live. Only when this person reaches the legal age of majority for their state will they have that right.

          If it comes down to a court battle, the judge will decide based on what they feel is in the child's best interests. As the OP has stated, they had a GAL who made a previous recommendation to the court, who ultimately made the determination that the child remains in the father's custody. The child's voice was heard, and it was decided that the best interest of the child is for them to remain with their father.

          We still haven't heard from this child as to what is so unacceptable about living with their father that they are so desperate to live with Mom. Many children of divorced parents may choose to live with the other parent simply because they prefer their parenting style - more relaxed, less rules and restrictions, more choices because they are allowed to do more of what they want. That's often the case with a non-custodial parent who may be far more lenient in order to gain favor with their child. Just because it's preferred doesn't mean it's the best thing for the child. Courts take those things into consideration when a change of custody is being requested as well.
          "If it ain't in writing, it never happened."
          "A lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part."
          "You can never make the same mistake twice, because the second time you make it, it's not a mistake, but a CHOICE."

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