Two States One Child

[OnMyOwn85]

I live in california and my sons(4yrs old) father lives in Texas...He was court ordered to pay child support a year after i left him two years ago and came back to california...neither of us have Custody...he hasnt seen my son in the two years but he does call to talk to him a few times a week(so i never kept him from seeing him he just chose not to)...he calls/pays child support nothing else...he now threatens to take me to court for custody...my questions are...won't i automatically get sole custody?? Does the courts just hand my son to a man he doesn't know into a state he doesn't know or will he need to visit him out here first since he has never made any attempt of physical contact in two years?? Also the father speaks Spanish and has family in Mexico how can I keep him from fleeing with my son to Mexico??

[Friend In Court]

Re: Two States One Child

I live in california and my sons(4yrs old) father lives in Texas...He was court ordered to pay child support a year after i left him two years ago and came back to california...neither of us have Custody...he hasnt seen my son in the two years but he does call to talk to him a few times a week(so i never kept him from seeing him he just chose not to)...he calls/pays child support nothing else...he now threatens to take me to court for custody...my questions are...won't i automatically get sole custody?? Does the courts just hand my son to a man he doesn't know into a state he doesn't know or will he need to visit him out here first since he has never made any attempt of physical contact in two years?? Also the father speaks Spanish and has family in Mexico how can I keep him from fleeing with my son to Mexico??

Where are your children now? In order to be ordered to pay support, it goes to the custodial parent or person who has the child.

No, the courts do not just "hand a child over" to anyone. And one the child has never seen? Not likely unless the custodial parent is unfit. And that would have to be proved in court with clear, convincing evidence.

Any suit would have to be brought in California, presumably where the children are living with you. He can bring it nowhere else. But do not tell yourself you do not have custody for if support was ordered it has to be ordered to be paid to the parent who has the custody, care and control of the child(ren).

Courts are reluctant to change custody or residency of children who are doing well where they are. And of children as young as yours, especially so.

Threats are no more than that, threats. Should you continue to have concerns, a consultation with a family law attorney would be advisable.

[OnMyOwn85]

Where are your children now? In order to be ordered to pay support, it goes to the custodial parent or person who has the child.

No, the courts do not just "hand a child over" to anyone. And one the child has never seen? Not likely unless the custodial parent is unfit. And that would have to be proved in court with clear, convincing evidence.

Any suit would have to be brought in California, presumably where the children are living with you. He can bring it nowhere else. But do not tell yourself you do not have custody for if support was ordered it has to be ordered to be paid to the parent who has the custody, care and control of the child(ren).

Courts are reluctant to change custody or residency of children who are doing well where they are. And of children as young as yours, especially so.

Threats are no more than that, threats. Should you continue to have concerns, a consultation with a family law attorney would be advisable.

He is here in California with me...the only reason the child support is being garnished is because i work part time & am currently getting state aid..my job offers no insurance...so he was forced to pay...I'm the only one who has him so he has never spent a day without me...so I'm wondering does that give him the upper hand because he files first for custody?

[Friend In Court]

Re: Two States One Child

He does not have the "upper hand". You, with the children do. A support obligor going for custody is a common ploy when they want to evade supporting their children -- figuring they can do it for less, "how much can a kid eat?," etc. the superficial reasoning. Judges can usually see through this.

The custodial parent has the edge in a contested custody case, with children this young against a non support-paying non residential parent -- who never sees the children.

Consult with a family law attorney is my recommendation.

[OnMyOwn85]

He does not have the "upper hand". You, with the children do. A support obligor going for custody is a common ploy when they want to evade supporting their children -- figuring they can do it for less, "how much can a kid eat?," etc. the superficial reasoning. Judges can usually see through this.

The custodial parent has the edge in a contested custody case, with children this young against a non support-paying non residential parent -- who never sees the children.

Consult with a family law attorney is my recommendation.

Thank you