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MA -at 16.. is my son allowed a say in visit rights? son wants 2c me/ex bitter

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  • MA -at 16.. is my son allowed a say in visit rights? son wants 2c me/ex bitter

    My ex and I divorced when my son was 3 mos..we had an amicable shared custody until my son was 11..then we had a volatile and severing argument..i struggled with a cocaine habit..ex took emerg custody.. My ex attempted suicide.. We both signed guardianship to his brother in RI.. My ex moved there and became verbally abusive to his brother and demanded the $400/ mo they received from my SSDI..the brother resigned guardianship.. And I assume it legally reverted back to my ex.. it's been 5 yrs & I am still unable to see my now 16 yr old (due to b a father himself 3/25) last order from court in '09 was for me to have a clean hair follicle and psych eval.. I am coming to the end of a 4 mo drug rehab.. I understand I need to request mod of visit order.. But we r in ma..... Is there any type of auto emancipation.. Or can I request his presence in court? Does my son have ANY say? He speaks to my sis and wants to c me.. But dad tells him I "only want to take him away"...I only want to help my son with his impending parenthood.. ADVICE?

  • #2
    re: MA -at 16.. is my son allowed a say in visit rights? son wants 2c me/ex bitter

    I wish to inform you that you may file a petition for modification of child custody in the same court which made the child custody order. You may state that your son needs your support as a teen father. Further, you are coming to the end of your rehab. You may provide testimonials that you are fit to have child custody and are out of drugs. You may also inform the court that your ex tried to commit suicide and was verbally abusive to his brother. The court will consider the views of your son. It always keeps the best interests of the child in view. The court prefers the child to grow up under the love and care of both the parents. The court will consider all the facts and decide the matter.

    AFF

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    • #3
      Re: MA -at 16.. is my son allowed a say in visit rights? son wants 2c me/ex bitter

      Originally posted by Benjiluv View Post
      My ex and I divorced when my son was 3 mos..we had an amicable shared custody until my son was 11..then we had a volatile and severing argument..i struggled with a cocaine habit..ex took emerg custody.. My ex attempted suicide.. We both signed guardianship to his brother in RI.. My ex moved there and became verbally abusive to his brother and demanded the $400/ mo they received from my SSDI..the brother resigned guardianship.. And I assume it legally reverted back to my ex.. it's been 5 yrs & I am still unable to see my now 16 yr old (due to b a father himself 3/25) last order from court in '09 was for me to have a clean hair follicle and psych eval.. I am coming to the end of a 4 mo drug rehab.. I understand I need to request mod of visit order.. But we r in ma..... Is there any type of auto emancipation.. Or can I request his presence in court? Does my son have ANY say? He speaks to my sis and wants to c me.. But dad tells him I "only want to take him away"...I only want to help my son with his impending parenthood.. ADVICE?
      The problem here is that you STILL pose a risk to your son. By your own admission, you are just coming to the end of yet another trip to rehab (this makes how many in the last 5 years, by the way?). It may be WAY too soon to start demanding visitation rights.

      While an older teen may have an opinion as to what they want in a visitation hearing, just WANTING to visit you may not be enough. Even if the court is willing to consider it, they may only grant you SUPERVISED visits.
      "If it ain't in writing, it never happened."
      "A lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part."
      "You can never make the same mistake twice, because the second time you make it, it's not a mistake, but a CHOICE."

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: MA -at 16.. is my son allowed a say in visit rights? son wants 2c me/ex bitter

        Originally posted by Benjiluv View Post
        My ex and I divorced when my son was 3 mos..we had an amicable shared custody until my son was 11..then we had a volatile and severing argument..i struggled with a cocaine habit..ex took emerg custody.. My ex attempted suicide.. We both signed guardianship to his brother in RI.. My ex moved there and became verbally abusive to his brother and demanded the $400/ mo they received from my SSDI..the brother resigned guardianship.. And I assume it legally reverted back to my ex.. it's been 5 yrs & I am still unable to see my now 16 yr old (due to b a father himself 3/25) last order from court in '09 was for me to have a clean hair follicle and psych eval.. I am coming to the end of a 4 mo drug rehab.. I understand I need to request mod of visit order.. But we r in ma..... Is there any type of auto emancipation.. Or can I request his presence in court? Does my son have ANY say? He speaks to my sis and wants to c me.. But dad tells him I "only want to take him away"...I only want to help my son with his impending parenthood.. ADVICE?
        your son can make that decision when hes 18. untill then if theres a court order whatever it says goes.

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: MA -at 16.. is my son allowed a say in visit rights? son wants 2c me/ex bitter

          Originally posted by Benjiluv View Post
          My ex and I divorced when my son was 3 mos..we had an amicable shared custody until my son was 11..then we had a volatile and severing argument..i struggled with a cocaine habit..ex took emerg custody.. My ex attempted suicide.. We both signed guardianship to his brother in RI.. My ex moved there and became verbally abusive to his brother and demanded the $400/ mo they received from my SSDI..the brother resigned guardianship.. And I assume it legally reverted back to my ex.. it's been 5 yrs & I am still unable to see my now 16 yr old (due to b a father himself 3/25) last order from court in '09 was for me to have a clean hair follicle and psych eval.. I am coming to the end of a 4 mo drug rehab.. I understand I need to request mod of visit order.. But we r in ma..... Is there any type of auto emancipation.. Or can I request his presence in court? Does my son have ANY say? He speaks to my sis and wants to c me.. But dad tells him I "only want to take him away"...I only want to help my son with his impending parenthood.. ADVICE?
          You will need to apply to the court for a modification of the visitation order. And, despite what others say on this forum, I know not just from legal rulings but firsthand that at a certain age the courts WILL consider the wishes of the late teen, nearing adulthood child. At the age of 14 and above, the child's wishes are considered.

          Visitation might be supervised at first and you will have to prove you are not a risk to your son -- hair follicle or other drug tests may be ordered and if done already recently, those are probative and should be admissable.

          Reuniting with your son is important not just for you but for him. At some point he is going to have to come to terms with and establish a relationship with you, his mother, on his terms and not his father's.

          A consultation with a family law attorney would benefit you so you know what you will need to prove to the court and hopefully you will have representation in this all important matter.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: MA -at 16.. is my son allowed a say in visit rights? son wants 2c me/ex bitter

            Originally posted by messyjessi View Post
            your son can make that decision when hes 18. untill then if theres a court order whatever it says goes.
            Messy has necroposted again! the posted quoted is from Jan. 2013 issue is likely resolved already

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: MA -at 16.. is my son allowed a say in visit rights? son wants 2c me/ex bitter

              Originally posted by sunlover View Post
              Messy has necroposted again! the posted quoted is from Jan. 2013 issue is likely resolved already
              Considering that the poster did not know where to start, there's a good chance she is still milling around wondering how to get a modification going.

              Messy has a penchant for necro posting. And being consistently wrong.

              Comment

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