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PAS, Abuse, Contempt

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  • PAS, Abuse, Contempt

    we just had a visit this past Saturday, and my youngest, who is 2, was drinking cappuccino that their mother bought for her. I know this is bad, but how bad is it to let a child that young drink cappuccino ? Is it even worse if that child is already sick with a fever, runny nose, stomach ache, and cough ? What, if anything can I or should I do about this ? And, how do you go about proving Parental Alienation? I have documented everything since 2004, and have several witnesses. What would happen if PAS was found? Also, their mother claimed sexual abuse on our oldest (4) and the case was closed, it was unfounded. Is there anything that i can do about false allegations ? their mother also refuses to give me basic info about our children. When i take her to court for this, what actions will the judge possibly take ?

  • #2
    Re: PAS, Abuse, Contempt

    You can report any serious health issue to child services and they will investigate. Take good notes and have witnesses to show any ongoing problems; a judge will listen carefully to any points you can make and may adjust visitation etc.

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    • #3
      Re: PAS, Abuse, Contempt

      Today my 4 year old told me that her and her lil sis live with their grandmother, and that their mother lives with her boyfriend. she has stated something similar to this in the past (in one of these posts). Can and/or should i believe her? I'm not sure if a 4 year old really knows whats going on enough to be creditable. If this is in fact their living arrangement, what can i do about it? the court order gave her primary caregiver, full physical and legal custody, and i only have visitation every other Saturday. Would she have to pay me back the child support if they aren't living with her? and would i be able to get physical custody while being their primary caregiver because of this? any advice?

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      • #4
        Re: PAS, Abuse, Contempt

        You could first ask her to explain what is happening; she could be deposed or subpoenaed if she refuses to respond.

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        • #5
          Re: PAS, Abuse, Contempt

          I had a visit today, and again my oldest did and said some things that concerned me.
          1) She said that she seen a picture of me, mommy, and her as a baby, and that we were all smiling. Mommy said that she didn't like that picture, and put it in her pocket. (this seemed to really bother my daughter)
          2) She asked ''why did the judge tell mommy that we have to come here?'' said that her mother told her this awhile ago.
          3) She said that mommies boyfriend told her that ''Daddy will be jealous when i am your step-daddy.''
          4) Said that a male Barbie was her moms boyfriend, and that another female Barbie was her. When i went over to see (about 5-10 minutes later, she wasn't playing with them at that time) I found the Barbies with the females dress pulled up, legs spread and males face between the females legs. I am concerned. should i be, or am i over reacting?
          If I requested counseling for my oldest, how would they determine who pays? What else should I or can I be doing? How do you prove PA (Parental Alienation) ?

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          • #6
            Re: PAS, Abuse, Contempt

            You might firstly just consult a professional yourself and see how they advise you

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            • #7
              Re: PAS, Abuse, Contempt

              I have a 5 year old deaf son who I spanked over the weekend and bruised his butt. his mother has called protective services and has opened a case.there is no history of abuse here and my son sustained no damage or lasting effect to the area.It was a spanking . She is using this as an opportunity to remove the boy from his current school program and take him far away. there is a history on her part of unenforced TRO's and false acusations. Do i just talk with the social services people or should I keep my mouth shut until I talk to lawyer?

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              • #8
                Re: PAS, Abuse, Contempt

                Answer any direct questions from CPS, but contact your attorney as soon as possible.

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                • #9
                  Re: PAS, Abuse, Contempt

                  I would call the local hospital and ask to speak to a resident social worker (all hospitals - especially a children's hospital - should have these people on staff). I would then tell that social worker what you mentioned above about the barbie's performing simulated oral sex and what your daughter said. During the next visit you have with your child, you might then schedule a meeting with this social worker who can then gently, and in a knowledgeable manner - question her about this incident. THat's what I would do and I'm a mother whose husband has been alienating my two teenage girls against me for several years now. Always be PROACTIVE in helping your child - it's never too late when they're still as young as yours are but you must remain diligent and write down everything your ex says/does with them that's being aimmed at maligning you. Good luck!

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                  • #10
                    Re: PAS, Abuse, Contempt

                    Kind of an old post.

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                    • #11
                      Re: PAS, Abuse, Contempt

                      I am just reading this now for the first time. Actually helpful for me.

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                      • #12
                        Re: PAS, Abuse, Contempt

                        Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                        I am just reading this now for the first time. Actually helpful for me.
                        Im glad it was helpfull.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: PAS, Abuse, Contempt

                          I agree it's an old post... so I'll respond to this one.

                          "I have a 5 year old deaf son who I spanked over the weekend and bruised his butt. his mother has called protective services and has opened a case.there is no history of abuse here and my son sustained no damage or lasting effect to the area.It was a spanking . She is using this as an opportunity to remove the boy from his current school program and take him far away. there is a history on her part of unenforced TRO's and false acusations. Do i just talk with the social services people or should I keep my mouth shut until I talk to lawyer?"

                          I cannot tell you how much you need to tread lightly here. I actually knew of a fellow who could not see his kid for two years (unless supervised by the court which meant very very rarely) for doing the same thing you mentioned above. Part of his problem is he let his pride stand in the way of seeing his boy. He's in Oregon. What happened is exactly what you described. My suggestion? Listen to CPS - admit fault and anything they tell you to do - do. If they suggest parenting classes be the first one there with coffee in hand. Meanwhile, like Sun said contact your lawyer. Hope this works out better for you then my friend.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: PAS, Abuse, Contempt

                            Originally posted by lori509 View Post
                            I agree it's an old post... so I'll respond to this one.

                            "I have a 5 year old deaf son who I spanked over the weekend and bruised his butt. his mother has called protective services and has opened a case.there is no history of abuse here and my son sustained no damage or lasting effect to the area.It was a spanking . She is using this as an opportunity to remove the boy from his current school program and take him far away. there is a history on her part of unenforced TRO's and false acusations. Do i just talk with the social services people or should I keep my mouth shut until I talk to lawyer?"

                            I cannot tell you how much you need to tread lightly here. I actually knew of a fellow who could not see his kid for two years (unless supervised by the court which meant very very rarely) for doing the same thing you mentioned above. Part of his problem is he let his pride stand in the way of seeing his boy. He's in Oregon. What happened is exactly what you described. My suggestion? Listen to CPS - admit fault and anything they tell you to do - do. If they suggest parenting classes be the first one there with coffee in hand. Meanwhile, like Sun said contact your lawyer. Hope this works out better for you then my friend.
                            The more you do. the quicker cps or dcf or whatever your state calls the entity tires of thier stupid power strugle. And in some cases the parent begins to see light at the end of the tunnel.GOOD LUCK.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: PAS, Abuse, Contempt

                              I have to disagree on the part about admitting fault to CPS and do whatever they tell you to do. I only speak from experience and dealing with DCF myself, when you admit a fault...they go after you, even it was something from long ago.

                              KNOW YOUR CIVIL RIGHTS before dealing/speaking with these people. I realize they are trying to do their job, but sometimes they don't always have ALL the information and they twist things around to fit their needs.

                              I had actually voluntarily let DCF come in my home on two seperate occasions and search my belongings for drugs (accused by the ex). They even went so far as to close my bedroom door while I was not in there...they are not suppose to do that...EVER! I didn't know any of this until later...they invaded my civil rights so I refused to let them do it a third time (after another call from ex) and guess what? They dropped the case!

                              So...good luck to you but know your rights so those people don't walk all over you like they did me.

                              Comment

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