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Child Custody Issues (a mediation case in regards to visitation rights)

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  • Child Custody Issues (a mediation case in regards to visitation rights)

    I am separated from my wife for 2 years. I have a mediation case coming up in regards to visitation rights with my children this Friday. I have wanted to be in my kids life, but my ex-wife keeps making it difficulty. She refuses to meet when planned, she constantly threatens to not allow me to see the kids if I don't pay her bills. She constantly tells me that she wants me out of the picture and uses the kids as leverage. I want to have my kids every weekend and have access to seeing them throughout the week. I also just rented a three bedroom apartment so each child can have their own room and furnished the apartment. Now she says that she doesn't want them to spend the night and I have to bring them back everyday duriving visits. I also want to be able to take them on trips with me and my soon to be new wife, but she keeps denying everything. What can I do? My mediation is Friday, please give me some advice. I don't currently have a lawyer either.

  • #2
    re: Child Custody Issues (a mediation case in regards to visitation rights)

    Before any sound advice can be offered, what does your current child custody order consist of?

    Were the children born inside the marriage? Are all three legally yours?

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    • #3
      re: Child Custody Issues (a mediation case in regards to visitation rights)

      We are supposed to have joint custody. She has physical custody. Both children were born inside marriage. I am supposed to get them every other weekend, but because I had roommates before I would pick them up and take them home every day. I have my own place now. I would like to have them for the entire weekend and bring them back on Sunday. She let's me do it when she makes plans or wants to be nice, but since I moved on my own and have gotten into a serious relationship with someone else, she has changed her behavior. I also have not been able to obtain copies of their medical cards in case something happens, I have no information on my children. I just recently received their birth certificates. She repeatedly has told me she doesn't want me around my kids and that she wants the guy she is dating to be their father.

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      • #4
        re: Child Custody Issues (a mediation case in regards to visitation rights)

        We are supposed to have joint custody. She has physical custody. Both children were born inside marriage. I am supposed to get them every other weekend, but because I had roommates before I would pick them up and take them home every day. I have my own place now. I would like to have them for the entire weekend and bring them back on Sunday. She let's me do it when she makes plans or wants to be nice, but since I moved on my own and have gotten into a serious relationship with someone else, she has changed her behavior. I also have not been able to obtain copies of their medical cards in case something happens, I have no information on my children. I just recently received their birth certificates. She repeatedly has told me she doesn't want me around my kids and that she wants the guy she is dating to be their father.

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        • #5
          re: Child Custody Issues (a mediation case in regards to visitation rights)

          What she wants and what reality is, are two different things. Also, what she wants is just too bad for her. She has no right to be thinking she is "allowing" or "letting" you to parent and know your children. If she violates the court order, you take her back to court with contempt charges.

          When one parent tries to control like this, you take them to court. Taken to court enough times for violating the order and custody can very well be awarded to the party whose rights have been stomped on by the other parent.

          You need to get proactive if you want to nip this in the bud. Take her to court for non-compliance of the custody order. When she violates the custody agreement, you keep accurate and complete record of each and every time, and how she is in violation. You bring that evidence to court.

          Advise, also, the mediator of what this woman is doing and saying. Tell them what you've told us here. Good luck to you.

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          • #6
            Re: Child Custody Issues (a mediation case in regards to visitation rights)

            Okay. This weekend she refused to let me have the kids. I called the police. I was able to get them. She never gave me medical cards. One of the kids became ill and I had to take them back to her to take them to the hospital. Also, after mediation nothing was solved. She still doesn't want me to have the kids for the whole weekend. She says before they can spend the night she has to come look inside the house at my furniture. Is that right? Also, I realize that she has legal custody. I thought it was joint, but it isn't. Also, she is trying to put a restraining order on my girlfriend because she doesn't want her around the kids. She is no threat to the kids. In fact, she is a psych nurse and is very helpful for the kids during this divorce. Is this legal? Also, I am responding and filing the paperwork, but I am not sure about the summons and mailing form. Who is supposed to fill that out and who delivers the paper or am I paying someone to do that?

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            • #7
              Re: Child Custody Issues (a mediation case in regards to visitation rights)

              She can't look in your house. She's not DCF or anyone with that kind of authority. Keep asking for medical cards. Next time, take your children to the hospital and when they ask for them, tell them you are not able to 9obtain them from the mother, ask her through e-mails, document everything. You need to make sort of a paper trail so if you do go to court or for the future you have actual physical proof of your claims. Good luck and even after your mediation, keep documenting everything because you don't know when you will need it. She's sounds like a very bitter person.

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              • #8
                Re: Child Custody Issues (a mediation case in regards to visitation rights)

                Document it all and take her back for contempt!!

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