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Ex girlfriend is pregnant, denying me everything

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  • Ex girlfriend is pregnant, denying me everything

    My ex girlfriend is about 19 weeks pregnant. She was cool about things for a little while, but when I told her I didn't want to be with her, she became sour.

    She told me she wasn't going to tell me when she delivered, and that I have no say in the name, and it won't have my last name, but she directly followed that telling me that I'm going to be paying her child support for a kid that might as well not be mine.

    As a father, what rights do I have to prevent not being able to see the child, naming him, and what kind of custody I have to have to not pay her child support.

    P.S. It's not paying child support that I don't like, it's handing this person money. If you knew her you'd feel the same way.

  • #2
    Re: Ex girlfriend is pregnant, denying me everything

    Yours is a classic, typical scenario. GIrl gets pregnant, boy runs away, girl seeks revenge for the rejection by using their own child as a battering rod.

    If you are unsure the child is yours, you can request from the courts a paternity test. As it stands now, as an unwed mother, she does have all the rights, and will have sole legal custody of the child once he or she is born. This means that while you don't have any parental rights to the child, you also don't have any parental responsibilities, such as paying child support.

    If she does not name you as the father to her child, she cannot get child support from you, unless (and here is where the courts are entirely too accommodating to these types of women in these types of scenarios) she later tries to collect any type of state aid, which is when a father being named will become important to her. The Child Support Enforcement Agency will get involved, at her request, and they will go after whoever she has named as the possible father. This includes conducting a paternity test, and if you refuse the test, the courts will have decided you are most likely the father (strange but true) because you refused, and you will be named the child's biological dad. It is then that you will begin paying child support.

    Unfortunately for your ex-girlfriend, she knows nothing about the law. In that, she believes you will pay child support but never see your child. Once she opens the legal door to establishing child support from you, your legal right to that child becomes established, and as such, you are free to file for full custody of the child, or at least joint, or even merely visitation. So she cannot collect money from an absent father whom she is trying to make absent. By going after you for child support she will have defeated the purpose of failing to name you as the father (something she cannot list on the birth certificate legally, without your knowledge and consent), and she will have only succeeded in opening the door for you as far as your legal right to parent the child.

    Regardless of whether or not you like handing her money (do you think you're alone in that feeling?), the money is for the child, your child (if the child is actually yours, which is why I would demand a paternity test), and as such, he or she deserves to be financially supported by the two who brought her to fruition.


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